Letters Column for January 2006: Send Forth Their Firefoxes

Tonight I bring you a fabulous selection of quotes from the comments and my own pale responses to them. It’s like rice cakes, only better!

I’ll finish up tomorrow, I think, along with the standard letters column stuff. ^_^

**

Huh. I did not know that Aristotle was one of the Irin.
— Metal Fatigue

Plato would argue that even Aristotle did not know he was one of the Irin, since God bound them in a cave at the center of the world and all they can see are their shadows (that is, you and me and Aristotle and Bill Gates and also Tommy the Elephant Tamer.)

The funny thing is that Tommy the Elephant Tamer’s source escaped and he would have waxed very wroth except that he could find Heaven and God nowhere on the surface of the world. Outside the cave there was only falling grey ash and the hard radiation that sickened him near to death.

It was very surprising.

There were a bunch of formal Greek dialogues about this but they, like so much else, were lost with the burning of the Library of Alexandria. Now only you and I remember how it was, and apparently, you have forgotten.

**

For a moment, I was thinking Weekend at Bernies…
— BethL

Oddly enough, so was everyone in the world, just at that very moment. Even starving people in India looked up for a moment and recalled it.

Do you think it was a sign of the apocalypse or just the teleological equivalent of a sneeze?

**

My god. Someone else has a mind warped enough to imagine the Channukah miracle being used to solve peak oil!
— michael vassar

That’s nothing! I intend to bury my enemies under bread and fish five miles deep! That’s death pressure.

**

few men can resist the temptation of the bard class.
— GoldenH

And yet still Vice President Cheney refuses to change into the minstrel’s gear I sent him. Doesn’t he understand that he’d be more popular if he jingled?

**

it allows me to immodestly imagine
— rpuchalsky

Hitherby: even better in the nude!

**

There’s something about the feedback loop between author and audience that fills me with enormous joy
— cariset

What feedback loop?

Is this the feedback loop of voodoo?

Do what?

**

This story made me laugh so hard I almost spewed drinks all over my keyboard and monitor.
— Kwyndig

Just for cariset, I’ll admit that I caught those drinks and used them to make even funnier stories.

**

This is just unspeakably perfect.
— Luc

That is why you must voice your praise using semaphore!

**

I lol’ed (literally — I’m old-fashioned like that)
— tikitu

Did you follow the strict lol’ing guidelines in Leviticus?

**

Thank you, i needed it this morning.
— villum

Hitherby’s the it blog!

**

And for that, my economics courses are now worthwhile
— Penultimate Minion

You can also braid them and sell them to unwary tourists!

“What is this?” the tourists ask.

“Economics!” you laugh.

Ho ho ho. Stupid tourists. ^_^

**

This killed me.
— mark

Ha! What do I care if you live or die, so long as you drive my hit count upwards with the pounding of your corpse-head on the browser window? Shake the graveyard, rumbly trucks! Let all the dead immured within their graves pound their heads against the keys and send forth their Firefoxes across the web. Let they who think to censor the Internet track them down in their repose and weep, ashamed.

Wait, hey, you had ‘This killed me.’ macroed?

**

I have never tried Beef Coke, but I’m willing to have a go. How much beef do you add to the Coke?
— random

Two. Two beef.

**

I think my favorite line is “Beef Code is the best.”
— mneme

It’s the best code because after you crack it, you eat it!

**

He hopes that if he drinks it he will acquire tricky gnosis.
— dan percival

Man! Cheap shot. Did you ever wonder if the building people climb in Devil Bunny is meant to represent the sephiroth? I’m a woman so none of the masters of Devil-Bunny Kabbalah will teach me. :(

**

WOW!
— Taliskar

Yay! A palindrome!

**

Priests get access to Animate Dead four levels before anyone else.
— ADamiani

That’s so geeky! But I bet that if you broke hag abilities down into racial levels that you could get a 4th-level covey with it. ^_^

**

Ezekiel is possibly a better precedent for the God-fearing necromancer.
— kastaka

I can’t use him as a precedent! Sawyer’s not done with him yet.

**

Is the Robin in any way drawn from an asian arachnid myth?
— silversmoke

Only very indirectly. Kumo, filtered through Inuyasha, filtered through my vision and the needs of the story.

**

spins a web, any size
evades the prince and wins the prize
look out here comes the Robin Hood

— bluegargantua

Actually, it’s not quite “any size” because the Robin is constrained to spin webs in even multiples of the Planck length.

No, seriously. It’s the rule.

This is one of many reasons why Planck’s afterlife is so troubled. Thank Heaven he has Heisenberg and a magnificient bodhisattva-weasel to fight at his side!

**

This reminds me a bit of the comment someone made that Violet’s suitor-vaporisation power would become less convenient when she got a bit older.
— melsner

Still, if you’ve got a choice, better that your suitors get dragged off and chopped up than that they explode right there, showering you with deadly kappa-radiation! That happened to a girl I knew once and she still glows green when it rains.

She can’t ever have kids. :(

Stupid kappa-radiation.

**

It’s just that loving the monster never ends well.
— Eric

Except in Hollywood!

Hollywood loves the monster, ’cause he’s shiny. Sometimes he even gets the girl!

**
That’s it for today!

Laugh, my minions! Laugh . . . and tremble!

Rebecca

6 thoughts on “Letters Column for January 2006: Send Forth Their Firefoxes

  1. [quote:09a4503d01]
    Priests get access to Animate Dead four levels before anyone else.
    — ADamiani

    That’s so geeky! But I bet that if you broke hag abilities down into racial levels that you could get a 4th-level covey with it. ^_^
    [/quote:09a4503d01]

    IFF they were all sea hags (assuming 3d8+6 parses as “4 HD” for ECL purposes), and ignoring that they are not considered “monsters suitable for play” (having no level adjustment), yeah, you could get it one level early.

    http://www.d20srd.org/srd/monsters/hag.htm

    However, if we treat the four hags as NPCs (as the rules mandate), they have a CR instead of a level, in this case, 4. Their CR of 4, in combination with their number (3) makes a covey of sea hags an encounter with an adjusted CR of 7. (DMG 3.0 p. 101)

    The preist in question has a level (5), and for NPCs with class levels CR equals level, for an adjusted rating of 5.

    Of course, this is only two levels lower than the covey of sea hags, so I am in error, but the preist remains your best pound for pound option for necromancy.

    (Seriously, I’m going to have warm fuzzies all day from being called “so geeky” by you of all people. It’s reaffirming!)

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