Reading Nearby Manuals

Sometimes you want a Canon copier.

Other times you want a Deuterocanon copier.

The standard Deuterocanon copier is based on the Book of Tobit. It works as follows.

Put the paper in the slot marked Tobit.

Seven printer cartridges explode. Finally, one survives long enough to start copying—but the printer jams!

The user wails, asking for death.

The user does not die and so Deuterocanon faces no liability. Instead, the Archangel Raphael shows up. He teaches a mysterious nearby bishounen to exorcise the copier.

Voila, copies!

It’s an affordable business solution based on sound, deuterocanonical, Biblical principles.

4 thoughts on “Reading Nearby Manuals

  1. Unfortunately, many organizations get models based on the book of Susannah– you attempt to copy sexually explicit materials, it jams, you sue the company, accusing them of providing a defective copier, and their lawyer manages to prove that you yourself are immoral and deserve to die.
    It’s a little-known fact that they are legally allowed to kill you. It’s in the EULA.

  2. I did not know that Tobias was a bishounen.
    I am going to have to start looking for a copy of the CLAMP Bible. With Apocrypha!

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